Presidential Growth: Lessons on High Standards from a Mother Who Raised a President

What type of person will your child grow up to be? What will they do with their lives? Every parent I know is consumed with and sometimes stressed about those two questions. A couple of weeks ago, all of my children were out of the house, and the answers to those two questions are becoming clearer each day for my wife and me. Humbly, I am very proud of all three of our children. They are thriving.

The future for your children and the answer to those questions are being shaped by you, educators, coaches, and pastors daily. We are all formative, most so in our younger years. In letters to her son John Quincy Adams—who later became the 6th U.S. president—Abigail Adams painted a vision of the future for her son and how he would fulfill it.

Read these two short excerpts of letters from Abigail to her son, consider John’s age when she wrote him, and reflect on four key lessons about high standards for young people.

‘The habits of a vigorous mind are formed in contending with difficulties. Great necessities call out great virtues – written to John at 11 years old.

‘If you are conscious that you possess more knowledge than others your age, reflect that you have had greater opportunities to see the world and obtain information than any of your contemporaries. You have never wanted a book, because it was supplied to you. Your whole life has been spent in the company of great men. How unpardonable would it have been in you to have turned out a blockhead?’ – written to John at 17 years old

Embrace Challenges: “The habits of a vigorous mind are formed in contending with difficulties.” Struggles aren’t setbacks; they’re growth opportunities. Difficulties are a form of strength training for our character. Encourage students to face challenges head-on, knowing that perseverance builds strength.

Expect Growth Through Trials: “Great necessities call out great virtues.” Difficult seasons shape character. Set the expectation that challenges will develop resilience, wisdom, and strength. Focusing on what will be produced can fuel a student’s endurance.

Cultivate Gratitude:  “Reflect that you have had greater opportunities…” Gratitude helps students recognize and maximize their opportunities. The moment a student stops complaining is the moment they can discover an embarrassment of riches right under their feet. Without gratitude, they may overlook the advantages they already have.

Take Responsibility: “How unpardonable would it have been in you to have turned out a blockhead.” Growth is a personal responsibility. Students must take ownership of their learning and choices. Their success ought never to be given; it must consistently be earned.

CLOSING ENCOURAGEMENT

Choosing a school is one of the most important decisions you will make as a parent, because it shapes not just what your child knows, but who your child becomes. At Indian Rocks Christian School, we do not take that trust lightly. We see ourselves as partners with you—reinforcing the values you are instilling at home while challenging and encouraging your child to grow in character, resilience, and responsibility.

Our commitment is to hold high standards with purpose: to help each student develop a sound mind, a servant’s heart, and skilled hands. We want your child to be prepared not only for academic success, but for a life of faith, impact, and perseverance.

Thank you for allowing us to walk alongside your family in this formative journey.